Broken Friendships–Smooth Exit or Nasty Ride-Overs?

Till recently I felt I was the only one with a hand of God written not just on my shirt but as well on my Fate – I was wrong; There are things I feel that I should have had learnt earlier and in better company than with those who made me learn it with lessons coming across. Let me explain:

For Years, My choice of making friends has always been staggeringly horrible – the only good ones made being from school and to some extent from college – the exception coming in from school in case of those relations which fructified over time. Normally the Graph of making and breaking Friendly Lines begins with the major pareto in the beginning and the lines ending with those ones who stay till the end – My Friend once said:

“Don’t make random friends whom you can call your support at every time when you may be lonely – Make those who wouldn’t be there for your “Lose Times” but will stand by you when you may want to leave the world for heavenly abode. And love those friends more than anyone in this life; cause you may not be a human in the afterlife(if you believe in one) – very distinct and logically positive in today’s times – you will not have more than a finger count of friends by the time you are breathing your last, so make those finger count people worthy of being in your life by being with the right ones.”

People will come by – be good to you – make you feel important in the beginning – and then hurt you and show you the level to which they can make you fall and/or fall themselves – show that Anger and their self-sustenance is more important to them than the relation itself – they will try to prove how much unimportant in this world you can be and how much of a maniac you are to them – in their eyes and much much more. The “point of distinction”  here would be to recognize those who act as your facilitators and those who are the inhibitors – remove the latter and try to maintain the former.

Facilitators would not want to fight over things that can be sorted by proof of deduction or reasoning or a consensus, while the inhibitors would go on telling the world about what kind of a loser they deem you to be or find you as! This is not your concern to worry about though. Life has more things to worry and enjoy than these – is what I learnt from my outside City life – Bangalore -

Sooner or later, Every one comes across these kinds of people who make the person realize whom to choose and whom to let go smoothly so that life is a better place to live – not all can be got rid of – but majority should be dealt with. There will be opposite sex trying to pull you down with their irritation as well as irrational attitude and unprecedented importance and demand of ideologies in their favor from time to time. Suggestion to draw limitations may not always  be an answer and not suggested either. but the point where the line runs dry and the mind cannot take it anymore – is the point where the line should be drawn – it might end you a little lonely or else even more powerful – since people who matter, don’t mind and people who mind, don’t matter

---Mixed Updates---

Dated: July 30, 2011.

Life has been good and generous to me. In all aspects! There have been things that are meant to happen predictably and things which are surprising enough to make sense out of. Puzzles of life being solved more inherently give a mental peace of mind for knowing how the universe ultimately unravels itself in front of our own eyes.

Some updates from my sides till date include a new job, nostalgia as I came back from Bengaluru to get accustomed back to the mundane and irritant life of Maharashtra Politics, truth behind the real south and the customs and traditions so honestly prevailing that mere politics of this state make me go aghast, new trends and new hobbies developed over the weeks, new ambitions and new outlook towards life, career and future. Everything has been a long process eventually answered from within myself up to the point which at one time was confusion and dilemma to me. It also involves those recent timely activities and learning that I have been lucky to be a part of!

Starting with, I finally am away from moving on with my dreams and careers prospects by a month and a few days to dwell into bigger and wider opportunities which I previously never thought could be made available to me as a resource employee from a completely different Tech background. Although I hold various tech offers till date and new offer calls pour in, it’s a feeling of appreciation and demand that makes me more liable to circumstantial happiness since I know now that my field has equal demands as I respect it for from my side. As and when time unravels itself, will the real zeal finally show its structure.

The politics at workplaces in the specifics of Northern Region of India are well famous to be talked about. I never found such kind of politics in South Offices of my current organization and hope to never find it again ever either. There are things which we talk about and things that we do behind. Each of us has a right to do so. But that does not imbibe back bitching or being opportunist in stealing someone else’s butter by means of superior ass-licking. I saw this not just once but many times to remember it cleanly and write it down here today. The more I see it on a day-to-day basis, the stronger my thoughts about this specific topic are made. The fluency of the thought is confirmed by the rigidity of the fact that no one wants the other to ever succeed in today’s competitive industry leading to opportunistic career fall-outs and rivalry and professional-cum-personal anguish between any two organizations or individuals. The times that I spent in Bangalore amongst the back biters as well as the workers has been memorable and will always be because It did not present me any mental unease and human interference in terms of work ethics. This is absent in Mumbai’s working policies with amazingly unrealistic deadlines and unreal time –based deliveries lacking quality of work.

Coming to the good part of it is the fact that I am back with my family friends and the circle of trust within which I always have been at the best comfort level and would always be! Having said this, though, there are certain factors which make me, as any normal human would, compare the intricacies of whether I coming back was a boon or a curse to my present situation in which I am endowed with? There are things which affected me badly and things that turned out for the better but the lessons learnt by losses are more which again define the efficiency of my mind being lesser correct at times when it should be. That is something I have been working on for a long time and yet progress in actual life deludes me.

My hobbies in twitter and Facebook as a part of the social networking life has improved by the fact that I am a regular twitterati following many celebs and artistes to dwell and learn from their life, the art of living. Although not extensively understood and implemented by me, there are thoughts which I could not put in words previously which have been simplified by those fellows, maybe learnt from someone else as well, and then tweeted which leads to certain gathering that I would otherwise miss out on. Not that it would matter but any new knowledge is better than sitting idle trying to count stars and infer astronomical deficiencies.

The newest belonging being the fact that nostalgia hits me when I read about Amitabh Bachchan tweeting about his Show coming back on TV –KBC. The show which I grew up watching and know how it was a show that brought the millions of junta back on the track of getting a mind to work on and solve and read books to gain knowledge about the nation and world and get better on their IQ. A single legend could do this all. And it’s a great step towards a new passion – learning!!

With all the new jinx and magnificence in life, there are doubtless many questions yet left unanswered and many questions best left to themselves for time to answer them. Fact is, the further we think, the more we lose time of what we are. And more is the loss of the life we live. So living and loving is the moral on which I wish to end this blog on. Cheers.

Blogger Tags: Life, Facts, Hobbies

Better Life!

People – Many of them, make you feel good, bad, pleasant, awry, happy, sad, circumstantial, ignored, avoided, neglected... words aren’t enough to describe what kind of people we meet across every day. It’s Life and that’s the way it has to be.

Friends – the basic subsets of people who make a mark in our lives and stay embellished through out our tenure on the planet; the best ones remain till the end while the worst one are let go off early.

Now why I am talking this?

Mainly because over the last few days, I have had terrible and excellent experiences in my life leading to a bitter difference I am afraid to have had made between people. No two people are same and no two can ever be – the thoughts, reciprocals, responses and feelings – they differ on all the terms. But that’s what makes them what they are.

“Always be a first rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else”

Well, to begin with, Life has been smoothening down over the last couple of weeks, owing to the fact that not everyone wants to remember the horrid past but remember that there are better times to come. And I for one appreciate and believe in the same. *Selfish yet logical motto*

Things finally falling in place, Losses begin to get reimburse and lot many things changing for the betterment of life. Its good to know when things fall for the better in places where you would least expect them to be. Well spent weekends and happier times with family will always make up for the time missed on occasions with Mom-Dad for discussions and family affairs.

I don’t wish to write more in this blog post since this has been an adhoc entry without much reminiscence to think or write about. But there will be better times.

Cheers for now and have a safe and healthy life.

Intervention!

Intervention arbitrarily means – Taking out time with people who share a common bond to nook out a small critique in one’s life which may be causing a huge impact in the bonded relationship. This basically means that the majority share of people in your life will be affected by the single-most/multiple decisions you have made or will be making in the due course of time. The word(s) in question – “Majority Share”

What should be an intervention like? What all should be made relevant? And is it really something of high impact analysis that needs to be amended? These are all stupid questions. The main concern of an intervention is simply to let the person stop his boring self-permissible behavior and bring him to the pedestal of justification of his actions. Not always can someone be right and most of times, people tend him/her wrong! Intervention simply soothes the blame-game effort into more realistic- sit-n-talk-make-understand kind of conversation

Needless to mention, I had one of it, when I surpassed my amount of booze and went into a consistent orgy (lonely) and was intervened by the best of the lot to quit. Nonetheless, there are self perceived as well as ternary perceived interests in the same scenario.

Well, its not really a proud moment to be intervened for some really embarrassing facts, but at the same time, it gives a kind of way to walk where. There will be tougher things to work out for and simple ways like smoke, dope and booze won’t help out, thus helping maintain the mainstream motivation of being compassionate and real in life without any stimulating help and at the same time have a life of dignity and virtue and know what’s right and perceivable wrongness in terms of one’s view!
Cheers!

Lonely Weekend

5 Days of gruel work, with the inclusion of travelling, to and fro from Airoli To Andheri is as painful as trying to win a 100 meter running race for a smoker. I have been doing it for almost 1.5 years now. And when the week ends, those Saturdays and Sundays which arrive are a boon to life. But are they always?

Most weekends are spent over the scale with friends as compared to any one wanting to stay at home and be with family. There are parties owing to slogan: “work hard, party harder”. But when those parties turn out too hard than expected, the hangover takes the fun out of the remaining weekend and all that is left is 'head-ache'. Drinking in Limit leaves out a good rep and turns down the limit of being carried away from the live to the unreal, but drinking out-limited, leave a bad remark and scar on the aftermath that I caused sometimes. I have had a chance to learn it the hard way and do regret those made drunk comments. And the worst part of it all is the bad combinations that are sometimes drunk – leading to memory losses and much more anxiety as to what could have possibly happened the previous night.

If nothing else, the scars of over-drinking are much more difficult to heal and easier to set of a distrust spark between two humans, be it friends or of any relations. Even true friends at such times, can meekly take the shift from reality to influence and turn their back against. The moral doesn’t lie in the fact of making new friends, or trying to justify the act of drunk talking, but to realize that shit happened and try to clear the mess; because that is what will eventually lead to a cleaner perspective, understanding and mutual acceptance of the facts and reality check towards oneself. Needless to say, Drinking has always been and will always be injurious to health, not just the drinkers but the listener’s as well, who has to take the hit after the drunkard is sozzled. Precariousness is the keyword to followed here in such a case.

Cheers.

Mumbai Blasts- Yet once again–7/11 -

Writing on the Facebook walls about feeling sorry for those who died/injured and victimized by the act of religious and vehement vengeance does not justify the fact that they are going to be at peace or the "Government" reads this! Instead, I prefer writing a petition and sending it umpteen number of times to the so-called "Prime Minister" working under the "Italian Lady" to understand the needs of a common man!
Hours after the Blasts, people have been running helter-skelter using the technology at its best to server to human needs at the eleventh hour; people removing their vehicles using it as a transport for anyone isolated near the bomb-stricken areas to serve as a transporter (for free, in the money-based world); People tweeting about their constant locations for help awareness using taggers to help locate the people in dire needs and pressing on remote points to help get to safety quickly. Blood Banks being quickly called for and statistics attained as to which quantity is lesser in number so those with the blood group can be quickly listed and called for donation.

Underneath all these, the undying spirit of Mumbai not only shows the enthusiasm of working out any kind of travesty the city may face, but also take care that all unite in times to come ! My Question here, which is also the reason for this post: Do we still need "Congress" or any leadership if it fails to mutilate the threats after repeated attempts on the same city and deems successful enough to kill a handful of mumbaikars every time?

After repeated attempts by the bravery shown by the Mumbai police in almost every possible activity regards to local killings, extortion, encounters, gang-wars, it fails to allot itself rightly in place for the main necessary threat - external. The Cops yet again prove that they can be scary when it comes to "night walks" and "night driving", "drunk driving" and "caught without a seat belt" - but one thought about terrorism and even the Prime Minister acts rapidly in sending the NSG and NIIs from over the state within the trauma affecting the city. Is this what it takes to be the second best police network in the world? I hardly see any of them even monitoring the road when in terms of alert (case in point: a Gujarati car held down for lack of license and being bribed over for); Under these circumstances where money becomes the chief source of dependency and a deprecating factor for most of the network of security dying out in the city and also, which remains afloat on the top of the system, beginning from the Corrupt Cabinet itself, how is this ever going to get solved. And yet there will be more money spent on the oncoming Vidhan Sabha Function for completing "God Knows" how many years of useless existence. The money if not the treatment in the hospitals will be far more fruitful if spent across the city casualties for those who were a single most- earning members of the family. But surely this will not be done since no one would want to see this money reaching any poor when there are already corrupt vultures seating on the round table of shit!

Its time and very much due that we do what the USA did:
"When Osama bombed USA, The USA entered his Safe-house and killed him; When Kasab did the same, we made his life heaven by giving him a safe house"

And thus concludes the basic foundation of security on dilapidated ruins. If not now, then when? How much more are we supposed to take till some "Raul Vinci" takes hopeful power to bring "apparent" change and yet leads to another level of corruption in the name of Youth Congress? We do not want such a leader ship and specifically the leaders from the Italian Inheritance.
And as my friend also stated: "Apparently, Kasab was born on 13th July AND 13th September. No wonder he is not dead yet."
But the entire nation will be, if this continues; we need to wake up and take stronger steps than what has been mentioned in the beginning of this blog. Let’s take an approach uninhibited and completely different than what a normal idiotic government would suspect and predict and sham in the end!!
An Excerpt from my other Friend Saikat’s Wall:

How many ears must one man have
Before he can hear people cry?
Yes, 'n' how many deaths will it take till he knows
That too many people have died?
... The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind ....

Peace and Sympathy to all those who have been through this heinous state of horror and fright; it remains not just a shame for the city but for the nation as a whole.

Rhythm of Life - It goes on!!

Its been a helluva time since my last post! Things have been happening at a rate where in my precedence over the networking and keeping myself active has been almost a kind of liability. Looking at the fact that even with my priced possession of a Black Berry, I have been unable to do anything but try to check in new Facebook statuses and tweet more often seeing the fact that there is now a bigger site with actual real stars who tweet comment and share their thoughts and acts of life as wisdom-nuggets.

Its been a heavy time knowing the fact that my resignation has been a annoying venture as a part of the practice to move on and explore further opportunities. What cranked the situation is the fact that they care the least to retain and that too, with enough power in their own pockets to do so! The more we try to ask for something deserving, the more conservative they get. With such a cost-center organizations in place, the least India can expect is ever to be in the G8 for next three decades, 'cause we are hell-bent on saving money and not trying to make a fortune from the talent that is garnered here and help fructify the other developed nations, mainly 'cause of the infrastructure and better economic compensation.

Finding some really good knowledgeable opportunities to learn from and Work is not a part of that. Learnt it the hard way that drinking is not meant for me. Losing 6k and dancing in the ATM singing tunes of my various Pin cards is not something I would ever advice to my children or any kids but the embarrassment did not come upon me till the next day when I realized that I was hit my the same people who called me their friends and couldn't understand the fact that I had hit them in the drunkenness utterly unknown to my fancy and reasons as to why I did so! It also showed the fact that showing my body consistent insults by means of disrespecting its make and filling it with whims alcohol will only procrastinate the backfire- not withhold it forever.

Coming back to the true state of current affairs, nothing has been of a better prejudice than the current rains which have been showering all the downpour and returning the waters being scarce from the sections of the city; there is finally something that nature doesn't seem to want us to suffer against and this works quite well as contrary to the belief that the reshuffle in the cabinet could've led to more water shortage reasons which now, seem non-prevalent. Just fine...

Many more incidences still remain to be written and yet, my previous save turned a disaster when one paragraph was not saved and I ended up writing this instead. Perhaps time will reminiscence those memories for me to write back in another blog to share with you guys in the times to come!
And I will want to add this quote as something I have learnt all along these couple of months:
Life becomes easier... When you know, which hands to shake and which hands to hold
Keep smiling till then! Have faith!
Signing out for now

Friend–ship or Wreck-ship!

I once heard: A Man is known by the Friends he keeps! Till date it was an illusion of life that made me rethink that maybe this proverb held true in the upper echelons of society, but today as I reach the pinnacle of my Age where in I have a duty and responsibility to understand and eminently perform the vast amount roles I am assigned as an individual, I realize but one thing: If you ever have to keep friends, keep those who may not die for you, but who surely would kill!!!

There are basically three phases of my life where in I can translate three important points to suit those occasion and in general the lessons learnt from them. Let me begin and open up my diary online today. Solely the truth (People might seriously get hurt here)

Lesson # 1: There is not a single person in the world who has had to fight his own fight when a kid, and if at all there was any, he still had someone behind to back up his balls in case of Emergency. So Lesson # 1 holds.

Since the beginning of my time in this world, I have had been brought up as a kid learning to avoid fights, remain unharmed and get his parents to help for every other thing a normal kid would lose his temper for. With time that became my trademark to be a punch bag and mama’s boy for a reason completely oblivious to my Child-mind during that time and the teens, who were my so called friends during those years, who knew what was happening and perhaps had themselves been through it, but too afraid to tell anyone and bring out their past to haunt them again. They found all the ways to intimidate me and try to make me feel as a biggest loser on the planet with only my parents backing me up on trivia and serious issues. (this being the time of my major accidents and loss of a spec-free eye-sight as well).

Lesson # 2: The best role played by any human being is the self-played role of himself. The minute he tries to walk in someone else’s shoes is the time he has lost his dignity.

By the time I was schooling, I had known enough things to understand how friendship works and what kind of people process what kind of thoughts and who actually get influenced by it. Having an Older Brother always helped me gain an advantage over most of the things, but not always all the things, since anything I did was considered to be of the naïve attitude in comparison to the same shit being termed as manly by others (Support for Supremacy always counts). I happen to make a lot of friends undoubtedly because I was only good to them and a little short tempered on my own end, which was a topic of discussion and many other things incompatible with the strong ones of the tribe to talk about, and those were undoubtedly my friends then as well. Turmoil of self-confidence was still a budding factor and was absent when there were rough times and I was asked to be a Rambo for all. When there were times to have fun outside School or any plans being made, I was a ‘thing’ thought of as an option to be either called or avoided. The major question was : Who would do the dirty work? And for what? (remember not all had the same opinion but not all could speak either). So it was always one of my best buddies whom I considered to be the one to tell me a convincing story to not be there and understand him. Of course I did! With time it so turned out that I was neither in nor out of the tribe, and at times had to question my authenticity as their friend or their authenticity as my friend. There were no regrets from either sides, since no body knew and nobody cared. But there was inconsistency and insecurity everywhere (uninvited birthdays, outings and other crappy meaningless-to-write stuff was completely taken seriously and made an issue out of). Trying to be one of them did not help me and I found my own way in the world. The College and Bachelors post the school gave immense satisfaction of the fact that I did something without anyone’s advice or consent.

Lesson # 3: There is nothing like true friends; it’s a myth and will always be! Stand up for yourself and throw the ones that hurt you; the earlier the better!!

This was one lesson I learnt only after I was completely stuck into it. Never got a chance to amend it or even bother to be open and talk in the face of the bitches who spoiled it for me. My College for Bachelors in IT was a pleasant one till it started affecting my relationship and academics, thanks to the quality friends made in the process and the same people who backstabbed when times of accountability as friends came by. And all this was because I was being simple and straight to one of the fellow who turned out to be my bum-chum! things were not worse till the time Exams used to come and there was group study where it was seen that I was amongst the isolated ones, things of utter trivia or importance were kept for the toppers and nerds or the ones who were the woman-clickers. The fights that arose between me and my then better-half did no subside due to this but only ignited bitter memories ending in a lot of things including my relationship, which also came along with reasoning of me not being self-sustained and mis-understood and many other acronyms. I was pulled out of the important pieces and kept as a shadow for many others. Making someone feel good when they are already low on some other reasons never help, and the best part is , people do who try it do not know the pain either. Some were fed, while others made up their minds to disbelieve that there can be some one who would not want to fit in when he can stand out of the rest and that was nothing but humiliation for them. There were rolling eyes when I scored my eventual 2nd class in the final semester. The world never gets happier for anyone’s success they say, even if the synergy of successes for the former is higher than this miniscule piece of success I may have derived once in my life. I still tried to mend things with the people I cared about the most and tried to get out of reach of those whom I felt would only be a reason for the doom of many others. It so happens that when there are multiple linkages attached to the same thread, and maybe you want to cut off a thread intertwined with the bad one, sometimes the clothes can loosen up and that’s a bad art to make clothe, instead let that thread remain and do with it somehow. Till date, honestly that’s what I have been doing since there are times when I find peace when the thread loosens up and is about to break, but other times the same thread comes along with another thicker thread, oblivious of the former’s devilry. The question I asked myself was: Am I now capable of handling this after 7 years of disgrace that the same people caused to my life when in college. The Answer was pretty instant.

Life comes in all forms. And its never a Destination; it’s the path that needs to be walked upon. And the Learnings it gives. I got mine in the long run. There may be disappointments, but no regrets, since I now know, who stand for me and who do not even care whether I am standing in this world or not! The irony of the situation is – whether or not I try, I have to face them everyday of my life, store their contacts in my list and be good to them even if I don’t intend to and instead live as if I am mentally at peace after meeting them. But yes, the sense of security it personally gives to me knowing that I now know how to handle which piece of the thread of the clothe and when to stretch it to threaten break loose in case of a severe travesty and disdain on my dignity from their side. :)

Ambitious or Discontent–Does one compliment the other?

It’s been a Long time since I wrote it all down. I have been hearing things recently – things related to career settlement and things related to contentment, opportunity and professionalism and look-outs in various aspects. Whew, that’s a lot of words to grasp in a single sentence.

I recently met a friend of mine who never leaves a chance to show me about me being cranky (I can be sometimes – this one was completely uncalled for!); none the less she begins about me being discontent from life and not happy with the current job and role and responsibility and all that. I just mentioned one thing to her – I don’t need to be discontented when I know I am better than what I am doing now. It’s called ambition to look higher and not a discontent to know that you are doing the wrong role which was already surpassed in your career.

People treat this issue delicately – it’s close to the heart of many and hurts personally. I understand it now. But I do not regret the fact that I know what I am looking for. And if others find it as discontent, I simply pity them of not understanding my ambitions for higher endeavors in life (Everybody has his or her own – As for the female, she was more interested in working extra hours working on excel and keep herself in shape (*that’s what women call contentment* ;))

As for the topic of conversation – it makes sense to be cranky and over ambitious and discontented at times – all 3 can never happen at the same time, but it will give you a perspective and an intervention as to what you need to achieve in your life and are you seriously worth the thoughts and talent you feel yourself capable of, and possibly the answer triumphs in the bestest of the results for the individual. As for me, it always worked and changing myself for a person who finds contentment in things that are remotely trivial is something I stopped giving a damn to, long time back! Ciao

Give some Sunshine ..Give me some Rain.. Give me some Chilled Air.. the heat of Mumbai is a Pain!!!!

With the Inconvenient Truth being the integral part of the truth that has been happening now for decades and almost a century with the most important recognition given to it – Ignorance!!! Global Warming of late, has been causing more Tropical problems (let alone the Equatorial Boils)

Climates in Cities near the Ice Caps are comparatively chiller than those near the Lines of the Earth… Having said that, Afforestation is a necessary propaganda being mentioned and stressed now a days – even to the fact of national campaigns being held in accordance of the same to make realize the fact of the necessity of a better environment for the times to come. But “Everybody says but it doesn’t matter, since no-body listens!!!”

Climate in Mumbai – precisely the place where I stay at the moment aptly puts in the calamities faced by the less common man of suburbs… and if I am cribbing about the heat problems faced by the fraternity here who cannot enjoy or rather… #Respect to the fellows of Africa and Nam who have to go through unbearable heat…

A/c and commodities suffice at times but in the long run, Asthmatic fellows like me cannot risk the long term usage of the same. There comes a time when we need to realize the true potential of the payback that the nature can give when it gets it chance! A brief and small example is already present in front of us as we talk this – Tsunami in Japan and the corresponding Reactors-affected-waters in the Pacific by now.

Its time we took a stand and realized that Its our planet finally and we need to take quick steps to overcome the global situation. It might be surprising to find another earthlings in the Galaxy surrounding us and if they are seeing us today, they might be ashamed to see the race going in at this rate of death in so high a manner. Let buckle up and try to save the planet. Drop by Drop, Count by Count and all would see the new rays of sunshine sooner than the next Dusk!!! \